10 Tips to Take Charge of Your Mindset and How To Control Your Thoughts

Taking charge of your mind is easier said than done. However, it’s not impossible. Whether you want to forget about an unsuccessful love interest or a professional failure, you need to hone your stress management skills. 

Unwanted thoughts can kill your joy and make you less productive. 

But the worst thing they bring along is distress and self-doubt. Yes, some fancy quote page on Instagram might tell you that you need to head out and seize the day. 

But how do you do that with such stressful thoughts weighing you down? How to control your thoughts? As impossible as it may seem at the moment, it’s doable. Managing stress and anxiety that comes with troubling thoughts is possible. 

First off, you need to feed this affirmation to yourself. Once you’re convinced and ready to make a change, here are ten ways to be in control of your thoughts and organize the mush that your brain is after a personal calamity.

1. Identify the Stressful Thoughts 

Your stress management skills are of no use unless you know what you’re supposed to manage. Start by figuring out the thoughts that plague your mind. 

Emotional setbacks are normal. In fact, they’re inevitable. If you’re going through an emotional challenge, identify it initially.

2. Accept Them

It might sound baseless to people going through a tough time but accepting your thoughts is the only way to process and let them go. You’d want to keep pain at bay. It’s understandable. 

But the longer you let the pain build up, the more intense it will get. 

Do the opposite. Accept the situation. If someone disappointed or hurt you, don’t stay in denial of the thoughts that keep coming up inside you. 

Once you view the situation in perspective, you’ll see the events that you went through were a reflection of their unkindness rather than your unworthiness. Learning this will help you move on and build new relations. 

3. Step Away From the Distressing Mindset 

Regardless of the situation, there are always at least two ways to look at the situation. You have to find the right way. 

If a job interview didn’t go well, don’t tell yourself that you feel miserable, but you’ll get through it since you’ve gotten over things in the past. 

Instead, tell yourself that you may feel miserable right now, but you did your best, and that’s what counts. You’re strong enough to deal with challenges. 

We’re often quick to look at the immediate effects of situations. Instead, take a step back and look at the bigger picture to break the circle of distressing thoughts. 

4. Meditate

Mindfulness is an excellent tool for managing stress and anxiety. Sit in your favorite place and clear your head of everything. 

Once you’re a pro at meditation, you’ll realize that you no longer need a long time to control troubling thoughts. Instead, you can simply pull a switch to gain your awareness back. 

5. Optimism Is the Key

Thinking positively doesn’t equate to denying problems or ignoring helpful solutions. Instead, it means looking at the good side of things. 

It might not help immediately, but it will surely allow you to look at things in a different light. 

Again, it’s important to remember that toxic positivity isn’t the way forward. You need to learn how to strike a balance between being positive and being aware of the circumstantial graveness. 

6. Learn to Erase 

When something unprecedented happens, it’s in human nature to continually think about it. But don’t give such thoughts too much room in your mind. 

Accept them. Feel for a certain period and then let them go. If you allow them to remain at the back of your head, they’ll always find ways to come to the front and bother you. 

7. Write It Down 

Journaling is one of the most adaptive stress management skills. Whatever you feel or think, write it down. Think of it like dumping the emotional buildup in your mind on paper. 

Besides making you feel lighter, it will also help you express difficult feelings. Follow your journaling sessions with meditation to feel instantly lighter. 

8. Distractions Might Help 

Distracting yourself in every situation obviously isn’t a wise solution. However, focused distractions can help take your brain off worrisome thoughts. 

Let’s say something didn’t go according to your plan. Instead of feeling bummed about it and turning a bad morning into a bad day, focus your brain elsewhere. 

Clean your room or go for a jog. Maybe read a book or do any of your pending tasks to take your mind off the events of the morning. You can also try to meet a loved one or listen to uplifting music. 

Beware not to let the distraction turn into a total avoidance of the situation at hand. Just let it be a momentary break. 

9. Indulge in Self Care 

Possibly the best way for managing stress and anxiety is to set aside some time in your hectic routine for yourself. It could be something as small as preparing breakfast rather than living on Starbucks takeaway or something as big as a spa day. 

Self care doesn’t always have to be monetary. You can take a nap to give yourself a break or prepare a hot bath to relax – whatever rows your boat. 

10. Go for Therapy

While these tips might be helpful for someone going through a slight disturbance, they won’t be much useful in cases of severe mental health conditions. 

If you’re suffering from depression, anxiety, or a related condition, talk to a professional. Besides helping you identify the underlying issues, a therapist will also offer practical solutions. 

Therapists use different methods, such as commitment therapy, cognitive-behavioral therapy, and psychodynamic therapy, to help people regain control of their thoughts and emotions. 


Again, it’s important to remember that stress management skills can only do so much. You might be a pro at managing stress and anxiety through journaling or mindful exercises, but when there’s a need to seek professional help, don’t hesitate. 

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